Headline News

by Al Yankovic



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Lyrics:

Once, there was this kid who
Took a trip to Singapore and brought along his spray paint
And when he finally came back
He had cane marks all over his bottom
He said that it was from when
The warden whacked it so hard

Mmm mmm mmm mmm, mmm mmm mmm mmm

(*whip* sound) Ahh

Once there was this girl who
Swore that one day she would be a figure skating champion
And when she finally made it
She saw some other girl who was better (*ding* sound)
And so she hired some guy to
Club her in the kneecap

Mmm mmm mmm mmm, mmm mmm mmm mmm
(*thwack* sound) Ahh
Mmm mmm mmm mmm, mmm mmm mmm mmm

They got paid for their sound bites
And sold their TV movie rights

And then, there was this guy who
Made his wife so mad one night that she cut off his weiner
And when he finally came to
He found that Mr. Happy was missing
He couldn't quite explain it
It'd always just been there

Mmm mmm mmm mmm, mmm mmm mmm mmm
Mmm mmm mmm mmm, mmm mmm mmm mmm

Ahh ahh (There) ahh ahh (Were), ahh ahh (There) ahh ahh (Is)
Ahh ahh (There) ahh ahh (Were), ahh ahh (There) ahh ahh (Is)

Ahh ahh (There) ahh ahh (Were), ahh ahh (There) ahh ahh (Is)
Ahh ahh (There) ahh ahh (Were), ahh ahh (There) ahh ahh (Is)

(There were, there is)
(There were, there is)



Headline News is the first (1st) song on the "Headline News Single" album and the first (1st) song on the "Greatest Hits, Volume 2" album and the fourteenth (14th) song on disc 4 of "Al-In-The-Box" . It is a parody of "Mmm Mmm Mmm Mmm" by the Crash Test Dummies with original lyrics by "Weird Al" Yankovic.

The music video of Headline News is located on "Weird Al" Yankovic - The Videos (DVD) and on Bad Hair Day: The Videos (VHS).

If you have any e-mail regarding the "Weird Al" Yankovic portion of Hotel XVR27, send it to either . . . .

  • PLEASE NOTE : I am NOT "Weird Al" Yankovic, though I wouldn't complain if I were. Click here to return to the "Weird Al" Yankovic Lyrics list.
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